I don't think I'm good at writing

I don't know how many bloggers can say they aren't good at writing. But I guess it's not uncommon, I feel that many people probably feel inadequate at times, even in their area of expertise.

Photo by Brent Gorwin on Unsplash

But in my case, I feel like this is constant state. It's not writing exactly what I'm bat at, it's more about storytelling. For someone who's read so much and who likes reading and watching movies and series, I'm pretty bad at storytelling. "But writing is not the same as reading" you might say. True, but the thing is I've been writing ever since I can remember. It's not like I haven't practiced writing, I've always had a blog and I'd always give my all for writing assignments and essays, and thoroughly enjoy them, too. I'd also get pretty good grades.

Me questioning my storytelling abilities isn't really new. I just didn't know it was called storytelling. Because I've always known I am good with words, but maybe I didn't understand I just wasn't that good with narratives. 

In some way, I though what I lacked was "charisma", I thought that's what other bloggers had in their writing, the glue that made their readers stick, the same glue that made me stick to my favorite bloggers. But now I don't think it's charisma, I'm pretty sure it's storytelling.

The thing is I always write haphazardly, I know all the theory about storytelling, but I don't actually use it in my blog entries. I guess my writing style makes it  difficult for others to relate or follow what I'm saying. And it's a pretty bad problem to have if you want to write for a living.

My writing tends to lack structure, and I tend to wander around, I'm never too sure what my goal is when I'm blogging. It's much easier in essays, assignments have clear instructions and structure, not like a free-style blog.

This can be even applied to my life, I guess. As a student, with rigid timetables and clear instructions, I was quite successful. Now, as someone who's trying to build a business of her own, not so much. Even if I have built daily routines and habits, productivity is still pretty flat.

My life, just like this blog, is just a work in progress. So I guess I'll have to keep writing, keep working on it and maybe then I'll figure out what I'm trying to say.